So, you have boyfriend problems, do you?
This is a huge topic that could take a whole book to answer completely. But I will give you with some useful guidelines that should help to solve several common relationship issues.
Note that the advice is very similar for the majority of the boyfriend problems listed – there are a lot of common threads to it.
1. Communication problems
Problems frequently arise due to the fact that men and women tend to communicate in very different ways to each other – men are more direct and women more indirect. Furthermore, each tries to understand the other’s communication through their own style of communication.
This means that communication breakdown between men and women can often occur – which can lead to arguments, anger and resentment between the two parties.
The solution is to recognize the differences in style, try to interpret what the other is saying in their language (rather than yours), and even attempt to communicate a bit more in their style (especially when there is something that is very important to you).
For you as a woman, this means taking men more at face value when they communicate with you (rather trying to find some hidden meaning in their words that probably doesn’t exist) and being more direct when you speak.
If you fight all the time with your boyfriend, you have to ask yourself a few questions. Firstly, is this really your issue (are you the one being unreasonable or argumentative etc?), and if not, do you at least have some part to play in this? If either of these scenarios is the case, then you have some work to do on yourself – irrespective of any issues that he has.
Secondly, if you feel that the issue is solely with him, do you really want to stay in a relationship with such a man?
You can’t just say that you love him, but don’t want these fights any more. This is because if the issue is with him, he is the only one who can decide to change – you have got no control over the outcome. Therefore my advice is to learn to accept fights as part of the relationship, or get out of it.
3. Relationship expectations are different
Maybe you want to get married and have kids, but he definitely doesn’t want to ever get married and is undecided about having kids. This is an easy one – get out of the relationship and find someone who is more compatible with you. You can’t force him into wanting the same things that you want.
4. He has issues
Do your boyfriend problems relate to the fact that he is immature, depressed, angry, abusive or self-centered etc?
If so, I have to warn you that unless he sees his particular issue and is highly motivated to address this, it is very unlikely that this part of him will change.
So my advice is to learn to accept him as he is (without nagging him about his need to change – which men hate women doing), or to leave the relationship and find someone who is more whole as a person.
I have to tell you though that if your goal for the relationship is to change (or fix) your man, you have major issues as a person. If he is not okay as he is, why are you with him? Don’t treat a man as a project. In the long run it is not going to good for either of you.
5. He cheats or flirts with other women
Similar to the point above, there are only two choices once you have told him that you find these behaviors unacceptable and he continues with them: either learn to accept him and his bad behavior, or leave him.
Sorry but the leopard isn’t going to change its spots, no matter how much you try to prove that you’re worthy of his exclusive attention. Don’t waste the best years of your life waiting for him to change. Most likely he won’t.
6. You don’t like his family or friends, or they don’t like you
Maybe your relationship with your boyfriend is going great, but you have a problem with some of his family or friends. This is a really tough situation to address. But my best advice is to stick with him and try to work through the issues that you have with his family and friends – maybe he can help by acting as a mediator. After all, you are going to be spending a lot more time with him than them.
Well, that’s the end of our discussion on your boyfriend problems; I really hope that the advice has been of value to you. Please also check out another couple of relevant articles that could also be useful to you:
What will help you even more though is going through my book What Men Want: The Essential Guide on How to Attract Men … and Keep Them!, which will reveal to you a number of secrets about men that you must know in order to understand and relate to them well.
If you implement the ideas that I teach, you should find that many of these problems you’re having with your boyfriend will simply dissolve over time.
Why will this happen?
Well, when you understand your man more and present yourself in a far more attractive way to him, he will be highly motivated to change for you and resolve the underlying issues so that he doesn’t risk you losing you.
Go grab your copy of What Men Want right now to dramatically increase your chances of relationship success: