“Does he really love me? ”
This is the big question that women frequently ask when they think they’ve found Mr Right, but are not sure whether he feels the same.
Everything might be going great with this new man, but at the same time there may be a nagging feeling of insecurity about the relationship that the woman just can’t let go of.
So, how do you tell whether he loves you or not?
For you don’t want to ask him, as doing so could make you appear needy. Also he could very bluntly give you an answer that you don’t want to hear, or lie about loving you when he really doesn’t.
Look at His Words and Actions
The best way to answer the question of, “Does he really love me?” is to look at his words and actions. See whether he displays long-term relationship intentions and behavior, or not.
When a man genuinely loves a woman, he will want to spend a lot of time with her, get to know everything about her, and meet her family and friends.
He will also talk about events in the medium to long term like next Christmas, going on vacation to Europe together some time, or even about getting married, buying a house, and having children. Men will usually not talk long term, unless they really love a woman and can see themselves being with her for the rest of their lives.
This of course does not mean that it is a done deal. The relationship will need to continue to progress smoothly (from his point of view) for all of those things to eventuate.
On the other hand, if a man only sees a woman as a casual relationship partner or a stepping stone to something bigger, he will not want to go out on a lot of dates with her, get to know her at a deep level, or be interested in meeting those closest to her. Instead, he will tend to want to spend less time with her and this will probably be highly geared towards meeting his needs (which will most likely involve having sex frequently).
A man will also tend to talk more about the moment than the future, if he doesn’t really love a woman. He will probably not talk about anything involving the two of them any further than a couple of weeks down the road. And if she tries to press him, he will probably sound very vague and noncommittal.
The reason men do this is that they don’t want to be the “bad guy” who misleads a woman and then suddenly ends the relationship. And they don’t want to cop a whole lot of drama from the woman when they do end it.
If she says that she thought he was after a long-term relationship, he wants to be able to point out that he never gave her any such indication and that it should have been clear to her the whole time that this was nothing serious – she should have known.
Sex Does Not Mean that He Loves You
Finally, don’t make the mistake of thinking that if you are having sex with a guy, it means that he loves you. This does not necessarily mean that he loves you (no matter how good the sex is). To you, it might mean love; but to him it may only mean that for the moment he is having fun with you.
Men generally have an ability to compartmentalize sexual pleasure and love – for a man, they are two completely different things.
Furthermore, if the “relationship” starts out as just a sexual one, it is very hard for a man to develop genuine feelings for you – probably because you weren’t enough of a challenge and this conveys lack of value to him.
He needs to fall in love with the person you are first, before he is sexually intimate with you – otherwise he will probably never experience the feeling of love for you that you want him to.
However, I don’t even advise introducting sex into the relationship until the man has fully committed to you in the form of marriage. If you do, it will be a much greater struggle to actually get the ring on your finger as he has little incentive to make up his mind on you quickly and propose.
Right, so I hope this article has given you some useful guidelines in answering the important question of, “Does he really love me?”
But to be the kind of woman that men do feel love for, I strongly recommend that you check out my book What Men Want.
In this downloadable book, I reveal to you 10 key qualities that are extremely important to embody if you want a great guy to fall in love with you (and stay in love with you forever).
If you don’t embody these qualities to any great extent, men that you are very interested in will pass you over for other women who do display these things.
It’s not that men are mean, it’s just that if you want them to give you what you want, you have to give them what they want in return. That’s fair, isn’t it?
Therefore, don’t leave your relationship success to chance. Grab your copy of What Men Want right now to become the kind of woman that amazing men love: