A big question that many women want answered is the following:
“Is he interested in me? ”
In my experience, when a woman asks this particular question, she is actually wanting to find out one of two different things:
1. Whether a man she is attracted to (but has not yet gone out with) likes her. Or,
2. Whether a particular man she has gone out with a few times sees her as long-term relationship/marriage material (or not).
We will start with the first case. You will have a really good indication that he is interested in you if he does things like:
- Keeps checking you out
- Hangs around a lot
- Makes an effort to interact with you
- Gets nervous around you
- Tries hard to keep conversations with you going
- Shares private thoughts/feelings with you
- Touches you when talking
- Flirts with you
- Sends you a Facebook friend request
For some more detailed discussion on these points, please check out my article:
The second case occurs when you have at least been on a date or two with him and are wondering, “Is he interested in me for anything more than just some casual relationship?” and “Does he see long-term potential in me, or is he just going to waste my time and use me?”
For this case you need to carefully look at his behavior and recognize the following signs that are key pointers:
1. Does he take you out on fun dates, or is he not really interested in spending his time and/or money on you?
Men who are genuinely interested in relationship with a woman are happy to take her out on fun dates, spending their valuable time and money in the process. She is more than worth it to them.
However, guys who don’t see any long-term potential in a woman will spend as little money as possible on dates with her, even if they can afford to or she offers to split the bill.
Furthermore, they won’t want to waste their time organizing the dates or going out on them. What time they do spend will probably be focused on them and exactly what they want.
Having said all this though, I do not think you should expect a guy to wine and dine you – especially not from day one.
Instead, I believe that it is preferable for the first date to be something inexpensive like a coffee together, so that the man is not burdened by the cost when the relationship has a high probably of not working out; and so that you don’t feel any obligation to him at the end of the night.
Then, if and when you decide that there is mutual interest to keep seeing each other, there needs to be a bit more 50-50 sharing of the costs as you start doing more expensive things.
2. Does he like spending time with you and talking, or does he only really show interest in “getting physical”?
Guys who are really interested will like spending a lot of time with you and talking, while those who are not interested will probably only show interest in staying home and “getting physical”.
3. Does he seem genuinely interested in you as a person and how you are feeling, or is he completely self-centered and self-absorbed?
The former indicates real interest, while latter is a sign that he will probably just use you and then spit you out when he’s finished.
4. Does he talk with you about his future, his dreams and aspirations?
Guys that have interest will want to increase their intimacy with you over time, by sharing their dreams and deepest desires with you.
Those who are not interested in you long-term will want to keep you at an arm’s length so that you can’t hurt them when they end the relationship.
5. Does he talk as though the two of you have a future together?
When a guy talks about events in the future like Christmas, summer vacations, buying a house etc, this is a clear sign that he sees a future with you for at least the length of time involved and maybe a lot longer.
6. After you have been together for a week or two, has he introduced you to his friends yet?
If he has not introduced you to his friends after the two of you have been together for a week or two, this would indicate that he either doesn’t have any friends, is a very busy person, or more likely that he doesn’t see you as a long-term relationship girl.
7. After a month or two of your being together has he introduced you to his family and expressed any interest in meeting yours?
Guys who see you as part of their future will introduce you to their family when it is clear that things are getting serious.
However, they are far less likely to take a casual girlfriend home, since they won’t want to appear like a player to their parents. Nor do they want their parents to like her and then be disappointed when the relationship ends.
Okay, so I hope these ideas which I have presented have given you some help in figuring out the answer to the question, “Is he interested in me?”
But to make sure that you are the kind of woman that men are interested in having a relationship with, I have some other articles which should help you in this area:
Furthermore, I strongly recommend that you check out dating and relationship expert Kara Oh’s bestselling book Men Made Easy, which I have reviewed here: Men Made Easy Review.
In this book she discloses twelve secrets about men that you absolutely must know if you want great guys to be interested in dating you, committing to you long term, and then staying with you for a lifetime.
These secrets are things that the women who are most successful with men tend to have an intuitive knowledge of (but other women have little idea about). This is why they get their pick of men, even though many of them are only average looking at best.
So, to ensure your dating and relationship success with men, go and claim your copy of Men Made Easy right now: